Game of Thrones Art: A Zone of Zombies

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on June 25, 2014 by dwbarbee

The fourth season of Game of Thrones just ended and it was a great season. But now we’re stuck with the annual ten months of Not Game of Thrones, the reality we live in when the best show ever isn’t on. I hate that reality. So to deal with Thrones Withdrawal, I created some art. Originally the plan was to make white walkers of the show’s dead characters, but that wound up messing with the color scheme. Plus, no blood, and there must be blood. So I made them zombies. And I made them in MSPaint, which might just be my favorite way to draw these days. Here they are:

I started with Oberyn Martell, because you start with awesome.

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Then I made Ned Stark, the show’s first big soul-shattering death.

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And for the final episode I did Tywin Lannister, fresh from the privy.

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There were others I wanted to draw (like Ygritte, Joffrey, Maester Luwin, and Qhorin Halfhand), but I’ve got books to write and flights to book. Let these pieces remind you of how awesome season four was. Game of Thrones really does get better with each season, and let us pray that it stays that way. That goes double for the books. Hear that, George R. R. Martin? Please don’t Dark Tower your readers. Please.

Praise for the upcoming THE NIGHT’S NEON FANGS

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on May 5, 2014 by dwbarbee

My next book will be a collection of three novellas, the title story of which is THE NIGHT’S NEON FANGS. This story came about through Eraserhead’s pitch-a-palooza contest, where a ton of bizarro authors pitched as many weird book ideas as they could. This was my successful entry, a story about an electric werewolf in a world where it rains mummies. If that doesn’t seem weird enough, it started out with a character who had dolphins for arms and legs. Well, after cutting out the dolphins and writing the thing, I sent out THE NIGHT’S NEON FANGS to some authors I respect and admire a great deal. One of them, Stephen Graham Jones, already responded with some very kind words:

“In my worst nightmares, the werewolves have these glowing fangs. David Barbee takes that about twenty steps farther, in here. Now I’ve got new nightmares. Better nightmares.”

If you don’t know Stephen Graham Jones, you should fix that. He rules. He’s a connoisseur of horror and has written a ton of brilliant books like “The Last Final Girl,” “Zombie Bake-Off,” and “It Came From Del Rio,” just to name a few. I’m monumentally grateful to him for these kind words, and hopefully you’ll be able to see them on the cover of THE NIGHT’S NEON FANGS soon. It might end up looking something like this: 

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Interview @ Surreal Grotesque

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on April 28, 2014 by dwbarbee

I was interviewed for the Surreal Grotesque podcast, where I talked about my writing career, the publishing world, how awesome bizarro is, and how to sneak into college without paying tuition. You can listen to it here. My interview comes after the segment with Juliet Escoria, a fantastic writer in her own right.

My Books in Barnes & Noble

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on April 19, 2014 by dwbarbee

The manager of my local Barnes & Noble is a douche, so forget having bizarro books on display there. But in Fairbanks,  Alaska you can find this:

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Gigantic thanks to my friend Sarah Hartley Shaw for getting A Town Called Suckhole into a corporate chain store! I’m extremely happy about this since it’s the first time I’ve seen one of my books in a Barnes & Noble, and I’m even happier because I know it won’t be the last. Bizarro will take over the bookshelves one of these days, and no amount of elitist bookkeepers can stop it.

Speaking of taking over, you should see about getting Thunderpussy into your local BN. Suckhole looks lonely. You can order it for yourself or just ask them to stock it, even if the manager is a stuffy old douche.

Report: Bizarro Fiction at MGA Con

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , on March 21, 2014 by dwbarbee

Last weekend I went to my very first comic con, Macon’s MGA Con. Swimming in the nerdstream has always been a dream of mine, with the added bonus that I’m an author now, so I got to sell books and spread my literary virus to the masses. It was a strange and nerve-wracking experience, but in the end it was a resounding success. Now I’m here to tell you all about it.

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The lead-up to the whole experience had me very anxious. Even with all my arrangements in order I was still nervous as hell. Enter my wife, who took me out Friday evening to visit our old friend Tyler to shoot the shit. It was great and really helped relax me for the journey to come. The next morning I headed out to the Macon Centreplex for MGA Con. Instead of driving all the way around to the building’s entrance, I wound up parking at the loading dock because a sign said so. That sign was a bunch of comic book artists smoking next to the dumpsters.

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With my table set up and a hearty breakfast of potato chips in my belly, I started to take in my surroundings. Not only was the place filled with cool comics and artwork, costumed people were everywhere. There were zombies, ghostbusters, a pack of teenagers wearing cute anime/Pokemon pajamas (they looked like a hardened gang, actually), and even a fat Batman. In the afternoon my wife showed up to help me sell books and refine my sales pitch. There was some sort of talk about my pitch being blunt and awkward.

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Then my friend Jeffrey showed up to threaten me with cannibalism, which he’s been doing since we were in kindergarten. He wound up scaring off a potential buyer, but then made up for it by buying a copy of Thunderpussy for his girlfriend. I noticed that Thunderpussy was popular with women, actually. The cool ones, that is. Some women shielded their childrens’ eyes when walking by my table. I took those instances as endorsements. Before he left Jeffrey gave my wife a Dark Phoenix bobblehead, which was awesome of him.

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On Sunday it rained cats and dogs and I practically hydroplaned my way to the Centreplex. I came to realize that rednecks really liked A Town Called Suckhole. One guy said I was lucky to be able to display the rebel flag on the cover of my book, because oppression or something. Others asked if the book was anything like their favorite television programs, Duck Dynasty and Honey Boo Boo. While wincing internally, I smiled and said “Hell yeah!”

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That’s a print that artist Budd Root let me have from his table. I’m going to frame it for my office. Mr. Root is an awesome artist and draws one of my favorite things in the world: boobs. By the end of the con I had sold almost all of my books and all anxiety had been lifted from me. Happy and content, I left the con and made sure to rub Aku’s tummy on my way out.

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I came home and reported the success to my wife. Then we watched the Golden Compass together. I have one last book, a copy of Thunderpussy, and i’m planning to take it to Avalon Comics in Macon, where it will be available for purchase. Now that it’s all over I’d like to thank everyone for their support, those who bought a book or made conversation with me. It was a great experience and I’ll definitely be there next year, hopefully with even more books.

Signing Books at MGACON this weekend

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on March 10, 2014 by dwbarbee

Well, it happened. My town finally has its own comic convention, which is beyond awesome. This weekend (March 15th and 16th) marks the inaugural Middle Georgia Comic Con, located at the Macon Centerplex. There will be a ton of awesome stuff going on, including all these cool people…

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…and me also. No, I’m not on the poster, but I will be there in real life, sitting at a table in Artist Alley selling and signing copies of my books Thunderpussy and A Town Called Suckhole. This whole week I’m making big plans for the event, so if you’re out and about for the Cherry Blossom Festival this weekend (for those who don’t know, the Cherry Blossom Festival is Macon’s honored and beloved pastime of painting the entire city pink), come join the party. You can get more info on MGACON right here at their site.

All the X-Men 2099s!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , on December 20, 2013 by dwbarbee

Sometimes I collect comics. Mostly I just read them, but sometimes, if I really like a series, I’ll try to get all the issues and lock them away in a box on one of my bookshelves. It’s dorky, obsessive, and not even profitable. Recently I ordered the last two issues of one of my favorite childhood comics, so now I own every issue in the series. That series is X-Men 2099. Back in the nineties Marvel decided to launch a bunch of books featuring versions of their characters set in a futuristic cyberpunk alternate world. It was awesome, and I loved the series when I was a kid. Now I have all of them. I don’t know how much of an accomplishment this is, but goddamn it, I did it. So here’s a pic of all my X-Men 2099 comics.

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I have a bunch of Ghost Rider 2099′s also, but only about half of the series. One day I’ll get the rest, because that series was pretty awesome as well.

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