NM/CL Tourney: 898 vs Polonius

Meanwhile, back at Elsinore…

            Polonius paced the war room, muttering to the warlord council.

            “Wah!  This is utterly preposterous, men.  That fool of a King should be drawn and quartered, wah.  Declaring a war on terrors is a waste.  We’ve more pressing issues at hand.  Norway is on the rise.  And now, we’re bombarded with this Inpire, Inc, business.  What sort of people are these?  They cannot even spell Empire!”

            As if on command, the doors to the war room exploded raining splintered wood and chunks of steel onto the council.  Polonius threw himself to the floor, just dodging an oncoming hinge.  The hinge pinged off a table and flew into the skull of a geriatric warlord. 

            When it was all over and his ears had stopped ringing, Polonius stood and examined the scene.  Four warlords were slumped in their chairs, chunks of metal and oak sticking out of their faces like they were porcupines.  The other warlords – men who, in their youth, had stormed the battlefields like gods – cowered beneath the council table.

            One, speaking with a voice that should belong to a mummy, were mummies capable of speech, said: “Mayhaps we should reconsider this war on terrors.”

            “Wah,” said Polonius, but it was devoid of anger and filled with curiosity.

            898 walked in the war room, Doomshooter in hand.

            “Wah!  Your insolence to this kingdom shall be revisited on you…”

            Whatever threat Polonius was busting a vessel to say died in his mouth.  An exploding head tends to have that sort of effect. 

            Cries of fear and agony emerged from beneath the table as the warlords found themselves covered in gore, courtesy of their leader.  Many began screaming for their lives.  But nobody moved an inch; they were paralyzed in terror.

            Invader 898 kicked stray chairs and leapt onto tabletops.  He took aim and fired the Doomshooter at the warlord council.  One by one the elderly “brains” of Elsinore’s government were reduced to…well, brains.  And brain matter.

898 vs Polonius


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