Archive for bizarrocon

BizarroCon 2016: Nebraska > Alaska

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on December 8, 2016 by dwbarbee

It’s been over two weeks since I came home from BizarroCon 2016 in Portland. Mostly I’ve been fighting a respiratory infection and eating Thanksgiving leftovers, which are pretty good excuses for not posting this Con Report until now. I’m even going to try to describe my experiences at the convention itself instead of just name-checking a bunch of people like I did on this blog last year. Generally speaking, BizarroCon is just an awesome time with good friends. It’s a lot like a family reunion, and it was nice to see everybody and just hang out for a few days.

 

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The most important person I spent time with was Kevin Donihe, a fellow author and my editor. That’s us in the picture above celebrating the release of BACON FRIED BASTARD. We both worked really hard on it. On my first night in Portland I made sure to buy Kevin dinner and talk to him about the future, especially how my prose can improve so that he doesn’t get eye cancer just looking at the words I write. Several of Donihe’s eyes have been removed thanks to my early drafts.

 

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Speaking of the future, I’ve been making plans to attend more conventions, and wouldn’t you know it, Brian Keene insisted that I make it to Virginia this summer to attend Scares that Care. That’s the back of Brian’s head in that picture above. When he told me to come to VA, I couldn’t refuse, especially because he wants me to appear on his podcast, The Horror Show. I also received a really unexpected gift. Christine Morgan made an entire series of Barbie dolls made into characters from bizarro books, and one of them was Psyche Delia from Thunderpussy. Then she GAVE it to me, and now it sits at home on my nightstand next to my bottle of Farmhouse Ale.

 

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That’s right, BACON FRIED BASTARD had a special beer brewed for its release! I haven’t had this honor since A TOWN CALLED SUCKHOLE came out five years ago. The beer was excellent, my reading was a hit, and lots of people wanted to buy my new book. This was the best part of the con, and I tried to soak it in as much as possible. That level of attention can be rare, so it’s important to make the most of it. So I returned home with a ton of new books, t-shirts, a beer bottle, and a Barbie doll. It got to be so packed in my bag that someone had to ride with a bottle up his ass. Luckily, Ole Toadlicker has been through worse. Those who saw his performance: you will see him again….

 

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So the convention’s over, Thanksgiving is over, and soon Christmas will be over, too. But before that happens you should know about my BACON FRIED BASTARD CHRISTMAS REVIEW CONTEST! Anyone, and I mean anyone, who reviews BFB on Amazon will be entered to win one of five posters along with a ton of other prizes, mailed directly to you. The goal is to get 25 reviews by December 25th. If you can give me a good Christmas, I’ll give you a one-in-five chance to win some AWESOME STUFF. Just review it and you’re in! Buying the book and reading it are also pretty helpful, but if the goal gets met I won’t ask any questions. You’ve got less than three weeks, so get on the bacon train! We’re already a fifth of the way there!

Prelim Voting for the 2015 Wonderland Book Award

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on June 7, 2016 by dwbarbee

I’ve just sent in my top three books in the Novel and Collection categories. You can vote by emailing your 1st, 2nd, and 3rd votes to bizarrocon@gmail.com with the subject line “Wonderland Book Award Preliminary Ballot.” Preliminary voting ends August 1st. The top books in this round of voting will be the nominees for this year’s Wonderland Award. I have to mention that my latest book is on this list, but there are a ton of great books to choose from. The final vote is for BizarroCon attendees only, but this ballot is open to the public. So vote!

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Best Novel
A God of Hungry Walls by Garrett Cook
Animal Money by Michael Cisco
Arachnophile by Betty Rocksteady
As She Stabbed Me Gently in the Face by Carlton Mellick III
Benjamin by Pedro Proenca
Biomelt by Carlton Mellick III
Boiled Americans by Michael Allen Rose
Cattle Cult Kill Kill by MP Johnson
Clownfellas by Carlton Mellick III
Domo ArigaDIE!!! by Jamie Grefe
Elephant Vice by Chris Meekings
Everyone Gets Eaten by Ben Brooks
Jigsaw Youth by Tiffany Scandal
King Space Void by Anthony Trevino
Live Bait by Cameron Pierce
Pixiegate Madoka by Michael Sean LeSueur
Rainbows Suck by Madeleine Swann
Ritualistic Human Sacrifice by C.V. Hunt
Rock ‘N’ Roll Headcase by Lee Widener
Scary People by Kyle Muntz
Sick Pack by MP Johnson
Skullcrack City by Jeremy Robert Johnson
Slasher Camp for Nerd Dorks by Christoph Paul
Texas Chainsaw Mantis by Kevin Strange
The Bohemian Guide to Monogamy by Andrew Armacost
The Book of Adventures by Gregory Bouthiette
The Lost Level by Brian Keene
Towers by Karl Fischer
White City by Seb Doubinsky
X’s for Eyes by Laird Barron
Zero Saints by Gabino Iglesias

Best Collection
Amazing Punk Stories by David Agranoff
Battle Without Honor or Humanity: Volume 1 by D. Harlan Wilson
Beautiful Madness by S.T. Cartledge
Midnight Earwig Buffet by Andrew Goldfarb
Our Love Will Go the Way of the Salmon by Cameron Pierce
Rules of Appropriate Conduct by Kirsten Alene
Stealing Propeller Hats from the Dead by David James Keaton
Strategies Against Nature by Cody Goodfellow
The Art of Horrible People by John Skipp
The Night’s Neon Fangs by David Barbee
The Pulse Between Dimensions and the Desert by Rios de la Luz
The Underside of the Rainbow by B.E. Burkhead
Wet and Screaming by Shane McKenzie
You Might Just Make It Out of This Alive by Garrett Cook

BizarroCon 2014: Like Pinball in the 80’s

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on November 21, 2014 by dwbarbee

Last weekend I attended BizarroCon in Portland, Oregon, where all the weirdos gather to read, write, and to just get excited about strange books. It’s a magical time for a fan of bizarro fiction like myself, and it helps me to build and improve myself as a bizarro author. Plus there are tons of interesting folks to meet, especially this year, which saw a lot of new faces. Faces like this:

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I arrived in Portland Thursday and met Robert Devereaux at his gate. He gave me a ride in his rental car over to Edgefield, where the convention was being held. Devereaux is a great guy and one of the first bizarro writers I ever read (seriously, I read his story “Fructus in Eden” ten years ago when I worked in a children’s library). Robert speaks with both experience and a real sense of kindness. He’s extremely nice for a guy who writes sex and violence the way he does. Anyway, I got to Edgefield, checked in, and started hugging people. Later I wound up in the pool hall with John Skipp and Jim Agpalza. Jim and I made plans for something really raunchy as we each got whooped by Skipp, because he’s some sort of pool Jedi.

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I also got some awesome books. There are always too many great books and authors at BizarroCon to properly give them all a shoutout. I got to attend two workshops, one by the brilliant madman Cody Goodfellow and the other by Brian Allen Carr. Brian’s a really cool dude and a VERY smart writer. It was great to hear some of his wisdom and generally just shoot the shit. He’s from Texas, he’s a wildman, and you sort of want him to ramble on about how time is a flat circle. Great dude. Unfortunately I missed his badass reading on Friday night, but made up for it the next day at the Broken River Books reading. Cody Goodfellow did my favorite reading of the con and Michael Kazepis was a close second with my favorite line: “I am seventeen going on dust.” Just beautiful.

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That’s Kevin L. Donihe, lovingly embraced by Michael Allen Rose… moments before he gives Donihe the agonizing electrical prod that he so desperately craves. And that was just one traumatic scene from the Ultimate Bizarro Showdown, where fifteen of us stand before our peers and strive to make asses of ourselves. There were a lot of great performances and stories being told. Andy Adams gave a performance entitled “Texas Chainsaw Massacre with Umbrellas Instead of Chainsaws” and newcomer Tom Lucas laid some very too-weird-to-be-made-up shit on us. In the middle of all that, Nick Gucker came over and gave me a backrub. Super strong hands on that guy.  Ultimately, Karl Fischer won the Showdown with his Blackbird poetry, using award-winning author and Broken River publisher J. David Osborne as a prop.

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It was fantastic. I had a great time as always and it felt really good to see all my weird friends and fellow writers. I got to have some good conversations with my editor and publisher and I feel like I’m going to be growing a lot as an author in the coming year. Big things are coming. You want an example? Well, check out the second name from the top….

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